Do You Let One Rip While You Sleep

If this tale doesn’t ‍make you laugh ⁢until ⁤you ⁣cry, just tell me and I’ll pray for you. This is a story about a couple who ‍had been joyfully married ‌for many years. The only trouble in their marriage was the‌ husband’s loud farting every morning when he woke up. The noise would‌ wake his wife, and the smell would make her eyes water and gasp for breath.

Every ⁣morning she ⁢begged him to stop letting them out because ‍it was making her feel sick. He told her⁣ he couldn’t help it and‍ that it was totally natural.⁢ She suggested he see a doctor‍ because she worried that one ‍day he might blow his insides out.

Years‍ passed, and he⁤ kept on farting away.​ Then one‌ Christmas morning, while‌ she was getting the⁤ turkey‌ ready⁤ for dinner and he was still asleep‌ upstairs, an evil idea ⁤popped into her head as she looked at the‍ turkey’s⁤ insides: neck, gizzard,⁤ liver, and all those⁢ extra parts! She⁤ took the bowl of guts upstairs ‌where her husband lay sleeping soundly. Gently pulling back ⁤the covers, she ‌lifted his waistband of his underwear and dumped all those ​turkey guts inside!

A little later, ‌she heard him wake up⁤ with his ‍usual loud trumpeting​ followed by a terrifying scream‍ as he dashed ​into the bathroom.

The wife could hardly hold back⁤ her ⁢laughter as she rolled on the floor with tears in⁢ her eyes! After years of ‌suffering through this torture from him, she thought this revenge was pretty good! About twenty minutes later, her‍ husband came down⁢ wearing blood-stained underwear looking horrified.

She bit down on her lip as she asked what happened to him. He replied “Honey you were right…‍ all these years I⁤ didn’t ⁢listen to your warnings.” “What do you mean?” asked his wife curiously. “Well,” said⁤ him “you always said one day‍ I’d end up farting my guts out; today it finally happened but​ thanks to some Vaseline⁣ & two fingers I‌ think I got most of them back in…”

Don’t ⁢just⁢ keep this story; share it around on Facebook!

Related Posts

I Invited a Fortune Teller Over with My Baby—You Won’t Believe What I Saw in My Sick Daughter’s Room the Next Morning!

It was late when I pulled off the highway, my eyes heavy after a long shift. Up ahead, something lay on the side of the road. As my headlights swept…

I Came Home Early to Shock My Husband, But Caught Him Digging a Big Black Egg in Our Yard – The Mystery Made Us Closer

I hadn’t had⁢ a good night’s sleep‌ in days. After ⁣three years of being married, Ben and I were like two ships passing each other at sea, him⁤ busy with​…

My 16-Year-Old Son Spent the Summer with Grandma – Then I Got a Call from Her!

So, ⁣for the first time ever, my son actually asked ⁤to spend the ‍summer with my⁤ mom — all ‍by​ himself! This was a big surprise ​since he usually doesn’t…

Johnny’s Back from School with a Big Fat F!

We all understand that math can sometimes seem like a foreign language, ‌especially⁣ for kids trying to deal ⁤with numbers and formulas. It’s like being⁢ tossed into a realm⁣ where…

Can You Spot the Lost Pipe? Challenge Your Skills!

Do you think you have ⁤keen vision or a talent for noticing details? Here’s a fun challenge just for you! I really enjoy optical illusions,⁣ brain games, and tricky riddles,…