My mother-in-law Gloria crossed the line when she showed up at Thanksgiving with a turkey that had my face on it. Her embarrassing “joke” in front of everyone was the last straw. But little did she know, I had a plan to turn her stunt into something everyone would talk about—for all the wrong reasons.
Gloria, my mother-in-law, was more of a saboteur than just a meddler.
Things got worse from there. Gloria’s specialty turned into passive-aggressive control. Compliments that weren’t really compliments, advice I didn’t ask for, and little things like “fixing” my cooking while I was still making it or bringing “extras” to dinners I’d planned carefully.
This brings us to Thanksgiving—our Thanksgiving. After years in tiny apartments, Mark and I finally bought our own home and hosted for the first time. It was my chance to shine or at least bake a pie without someone swooping in with “a better recipe.”
I wanted everything perfect. The house smelled like cinnamon and roasted turkey; the dinner table had real cloth napkins (a luxury); and my apple pie crust looked magazine-worthy.
For a moment, I thought I’d won over the family until Gloria arrived.
“Hello everyone!” she declared loudly. “I’ve brought a turkey! Made it extra special for you.”
I froze mid-step; my smile felt as stiff as old leftovers from last week. “Oh… how thoughtful.”
“Oh it’s nothing,” she said dismissively as if she owned the place while heading straight for the kitchen. “Besides, you might need backup; these things can be tricky.”
A backup? For MY turkey? The one I’d been basting all morning?
“Gloria, everything’s under control,” I said calmly.
She hesitated just long enough to give me one of her tight-lipped smiles—the kind that could spoil milk. “Of course! I’m just here to help.”
Surprisingly enough, dinner went well—or at least better than expected.
For some time, I let myself relax thinking maybe I’d pulled this off.
Even Gloria seemed quiet for once sipping her wine and making vague polite comments about how nice everything looked on the table but soon enough she’d make her next move.
“Everyone!” Gloria’s voice rang out controlling like an orchestra conductor silencing musicians with just one gesture! She clinked her glass for attention then stood up dramatically saying “I thought it’d be fun to add something personal this year!”
She slowly lifted off the lid like revealing an antique treasure; for one brief second,I thought maybe i was imagining things!
Her perfectly roasted turkey had a laminated photo of MY face right smack dab in its center!
Gloria stood there grinning proudly hands on hips as if showing off art work.”I figured,”she said innocently,”it’d fit since Stephanie’s been such a turkey this year!”
For illustration purposes onlyBut Gloria didn’t hold back—her laughter filled every corner of room full-throated & triumphant! She reveled in chaos she’d created!
Humiliated doesn’t even begin describe how i felt then!
She’d done it again—humiliated me right before everyone else IN MY OWN HOME!
But this time would be different—I wouldn’t let her win again!
Taking deep breath steadied myself then rose purposefully grabbing phone readying revenge…
After guests left,I poured myself glass wine opened laptop.Did gloria want attention? Fine.I’d give more than ever imagined!
I created Facebook event called ‘Gloria’s Annual Turkey Roast,’ tagged all friends submitted pics of HER masterpiece.
The description read,”Need centerpiece holiday table?
For illustration purposes onlyBy morning post spread through community fast.Gloria overwhelmed calls messages appeared red-faced furious knocking door down screaming,“HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?”
With sweet smile replied,“Oh gloria thought you’d love attention! Everyone raving creativity!”
“People think I’m INSANE!”she yelled back.“Dozens calls —someone even asked roast cat’s face their CAT!”
Mark who quietly watched finally spoke up.”Mom,you humiliated first.Be grateful didn’t print billboard.”
In weeks after,turkey story became local legend.Glorias nickname became ‘the Turkey Lady’ though she’d never admit antics calmed down after that.
As for me?Thanksgiving our house turned treasured infamous memory—a reminder sometimes vengeance served side wit.
